Being Present Blogs

Being present is something that I find is a hard concept to wrap my head around. Does it mean don’t have goals? Does it mean forget about the past and how it has, and still does, impact my life? 

 

I know the concept isn’t as black and white as that, but it doesn’t stop me from ruminating on these questions. All I seem to do when I ponder on this is come up with more questions. How do I make sure I stay present in moments? How do I sit with emotions being present that bring up? So, I thought, for this, my first blog, I’ll answer the questions I can. I’ll make this a topic I work through as I work through my physical and mental health journey. This will be a journey all on its own. It can show me, and you the reader, where I’ve grown and where I’ve slipped and gotten back up.

 

Firstly, I don’t think being present means having no goals. I think it means sitting with the current task, situation, environment, that I am in that is working me towards that next goal. Sit with all the emotions, thoughts, sensations I need to, to help me grow NOW, which works me to that next step on the journey.

 

Secondly, I don’t think it means forgetting about the past, but using those experiences as a tool to teach us about the strength it took to get through whatever that challenge, trauma or pain. About using those skills built, to push us to that goal we have. 

 

I think it’s about learning to love and forgive ourselves now, and work on trusting ourselves now, for past events. I am learning, just because we didn’t cause, encourage, or willingly engage in something, it doesn’t mean we don’t hold some blame over our own heads.

 

It doesn’t mean we don’t question ourselves. Why didn’t you run away? Why didn’t you scream? Why didn’t you ask for help? Why didn’t you leave? Whatever that question is, you used to blame yourself, I think part of living in the present is learning to drop the questions, the blame, the self-hate and learning to love yourself.

 

I think making sure to stay present in the moment is doing things like being at the event, not watching through the phone. Technology down at dinner. Grounding techniques are something I’ve been looking into also. When I’m feeling overwhelmed, going for walks, sitting in the garden and smelling the flowers, playing with the animals. Small, easy things to do to help keep me in the moment when things become too hard to handle. 

 

When I start ruminating (repetitive thinking or dwelling on negative feelings, thoughts, events, distress, their causes and consequences), I found re-engaging in the room helpful.

 

How do I sit with emotions being present and brought up? (see the answer is the second post of this series)

 

Thank you for being on this journey with me.

Echo❤️